How do I believe, what is the sum of all things
when I add or subtract, multiply or divide
like all the four seasons comprised in one day?
What is the stone flung, that takes with it all possessions?
like a soul that must lose to maintain everything else’s equilibrium?
And do I call on Mother, Father, Lover,
forgetting each name, as if memory too was abandoned
Would God be my name if my identity was stolen
and my creation taken away, or forsaken?
I am just cold with equanimity, and a fire of love
that has to be shadowed in a penumbra where love is only an option among options
when I am to believe, thus, I am not prepared to have anything
so as not to be ashamed with the guilt of preferring one love over the other
And how do you all tear me apart so? That should I care?
Or laugh in the ironies of eternity bringing me the same fate
again and again? I am laughing…I am mocking…I am in contempt
Or forget to be sardonic; with the whispers of Mum and Dad saying: Let it be! Let it be!
Or my eternal love teaching me the wisdom of sublimity
This frail juncture that seizes me and makes me gravitate to disillusion
But I am never desperate for wanting. For I am eternally patient.
You must be all burdened with the culpability.
I can only say, Mary would never forgive Saint Paul!
And so would Joseph, be hating the one who caused his son James the Just to fall
And Sarah could love James, but would she forgive the perpetrator
when James, himself, is never willing to forgive him?
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