Was it rock and roll? Was it Jazz?: A poem

I could turn on the music systems in my humble abode

any time I want to; but I couldn’t be bothered anymore

whether they are playing my song or anybody else’s. Trust me, I

don’t have a short memory for hostility; or the weapons

used against me! I am like a child who learns out of self-

exploration as well as incandescent revelation! Most times,

people think I am making much ado about nothing, even when

I am not complaining about the immense pain and torture

you all put me through for my standing up like a perennial braveheart

for truth and justice. I didn’t ever insist that you all peer into the

mirror and reflect on your own hypocrisy! The fingers that you all pointed

at me had three fingers pointing back at you all! Yes, I have a right to be

admonishing and dismissive of you all, at this point,  for trying to shoot down the

victim all through. And I can vociferously tell you all how much you all are indebted

to me, but I just couldn’t be bothered with any of the returns of how much

you all owe me! I know who to send the stinkers to (the Left!), and yet I

am fair to them when they do not deserve it! How ? Why? Because you all

are certainly aware, but pretend  to be ignorant, of all the terrible treachery

committed against me!!! I just want to be ever-so blunt with you all –

that I am not amenable to evil Saint Paul or to disgusting Ananus ben Ananus;

though I am yet to decide who is the bigger evil of them two! And it

may be a choice I will never make! I listen to my own music reverberating on

the walls of my soul! Because I don’t feel like I trust anybody’s alleged good advice,

and do you think I can afford to have any friends or loves or have faith in anybody else

with all the treachery committed against me? I thought it was wise to be silent all through

my life, but sometimes, it is judicious to rake up the past and present in a reckless showdown

of anger and rage! You know, it is a miracle that all this selfless eternal patience and restraint that I

undertook didn’t get me declinating into a most tragic meltdown or harakiri! Yet, I have been

religiously, assiduously and emphatically astute in my declinature of evil’s propositions.

Shame on you all for punishing me for pursuing all your own redemption and not thinking

about my own suffering (and torture), in spite of all your humongous ingratitude, and all your

trivialising of my immense sacrifice! I just paid attention to the music playing behind all your

obnoxious selfish din! Was it my own soul calling like a Pied Piper instructing my Nataraja

dance of sacrifice, the rock and roll behind the troll, the jazz above the crass! I was never

introduced to jazz music in my life, but I relished the daiquiri of profundity, because Jazz has

an entitlement like a predominant and eternal fixture on the terra firma of my soul!!!